In a surprise move today, Toyota announced that their entire F1 program had been nothing but a cover to hide the secret purpose of their facilities in Cologne - a research and development program for the production of giant hairnets. Toyota spokesman Kudwigo Animoslo confirmed the 5-year program, which shed light on the company's long-time employment of both Ralf Schumacher and Jarno Trulli.
Said Animoslo, "We are actually unveiling this exciting new product ahead of schedule. Our plans were to complete the line with an even larger model; but as you know our negotiations with Raikkonen fell through, leaving us without a suitably sized head to use for testing."
Toyota refused comment on the rumors that the team is planning a return to the sport in 2012, when both Fernando Alonso and Lewis Hamilton's contracts are due to expire.
